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Help for Parents of Troubled Girls

Having compassion for the parents of Troubled Teens is our job. Troubled teens, especially troubled girls, can cause parents a great deal of grief and suffering.  Fathers of troubled girls take it harder than do moms, yet both parents can feel defeated and destroyed.  

There sweet little girl is sneaking out, skipping school, hanging out with the wrong crowd, smoking, and drinking, and otherwise making really poor decisions.  Parents are in crisis literally.  A faith based boarding school or RTC will minister hope, restore the family, and change hearts – all for the glory of God.

Look for a program that helps troubled girls ages 12-18. Call today for free information that may save your teen.

Please enjoy the following teaching on compassion courtesy of Integrity House RTC.  

Compassion Goes the Distance, by Sandy Brunson, Troubled Teen Search Director of Ministry.

 In writing about growing to maturity, we understand that one who had come to some measure of spiritual maturity is not only able…but does walk in “compassion: Love’s action” as Jesus, our Lord, does.

Godly compassion should be high on our personal list of applied behavior…for it was a virtue and an action of Jesus.  The Word teaches us in Hebrews 4:15 that Jesus, Himself, was “touched with the FEELING of our infirmities!” That is the way it is written in the KJV.

Other translations say it like this: He “sympathizes with our weaknesses.” Jesus knows what it feels like to have pain, brokenness, anguish. He was “touched by those things,” and he “suffers WITH US.”  Compassion is one of the virtues of God. He is with us in our pain, and often He calls upon us to not only be willing, but obedient in flowing in compassion with others. In displaying this virtue of God, we will often be asked to “go where it hurts, to enter into places of pain, to share in brokenness, fear, confusion, and anguish.

Compassion challenges us to cry out with those in misery, to mourn with those who are lonely, to weep with those in tears. Compassion requires us to be weak with the weak, vulnerable with the vulnerable, and powerless with the powerless. Compassion means full immersion in the condition of being human.”  “When we look at compassion this way, it becomes clear that something more is involved than a general kindness or tenderheartedness. It is not surprising that compassion, understood as ‘suffering with,’ often evokes in us a deep resistance and even protest. It is important for us to acknowledge this resistance and to recognize that suffering is not something we desire or to which we are ‘attracted’.

On the contrary, it is something we want to avoid at all cost. Therefore, compassion is not among our most ‘natural’ responses. We are pain-avoiders, and we consider anyone who feels attracted to suffering abnormal, or at least, very unusual.” (excerpts from Compassion: A Reflection on the Christian Life by Henri Nouwen) 

I write these words to all people acquainted with grief, sorrow, pain, hurt, confusion, fear, and anguish. All human beings experience these things in life as a result of many kinds of circumstances in this fallen world. Many people are tender, still hurting, still feeling the pain of what they are experiencing or have been through. Yet, by the Spirit, we “sense” that our Jesus “understands”…He “knows”, He has been “touched by the feeling of our infirmities (sorrows)”. He “sympathizes with our weaknesses.” God is a Comforter, and He has “compassion”…the ability to “suffer WITH us” in our times of need.  As recipients of this “compassion”…we are humbled. We clearly “understand” the need for others to “take the time” to “feel WITH US”.

We KNOW what that “feels like”, and we know what it feels like when others do not move with “compassion” with us in time of our need. Many times, others do not show “compassion” because they are like the above reference says….pain-avoiders; for “compassion is NOT among our most ‘natural’ responses.”  People do not like to be “vulnerable”….so they “avoid” those who are. People do not like to feel “out of control”…so they “avoid” those who are. People do not like to experience “pain”…so they “avoid” those who are. At least…I might say…on a long term basis.  

When we experience a sickness, or have a loved one to die, we often experience a great initial outpouring of “sympathy.” That is the “politically correct” thing to show in society. Sympathy is a good thing…but know that often it is not the same as godly “compassion.” Sympathy will greet us, and offer condolences and make initial contact…but sympathy does not stay for the long haul…throughout the entire grieving process! It only “drops by” for a short while…unwilling to stay during the long night of loneliness into which grief plunges us.  

Compassion remains. Compassion goes the distance. And may I add that true compassion can ONLY come from its spiritual Source…Almighty God! Jesus demonstrated it, and the Holy Spirit comes to us today as the Comforter to strengthen us with the enduring gift of it. Yet we must each “humble ourselves” under His mighty hand to “receive it” and allow Him to “work it in us as a permanent part of our character and nature” IN HIM!  

If you would like to know more about therapeutic boarding school and other residential programs for troubled teens, please contact a family counselor at Zion Educational Systems for guidance.  To get started click the button below!

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